That’s such a spot on statement. God winks, even if you miss it...He winks. Even when your plan doesn’t happen...He winks. I think that it solidifies Him saying, “I gotchu girl. Rest in me.” If you’re anything like me, you suffer from anxiety from time to time. We all do. But in addition to anxiety, I am Type A all the way and I feel content when I plan and organize. I’m learning that it either results in me doing a beautiful dance or having a meltdown. Or both.
There was a time, where I wanted things to happen my way RIGHT then. And I sometimes still do. But as I’ve become more spiritually mature, I’ve learned 3 things:
God runs the show. Rejection is God’s protection. When a certain door doesn’t open for me, I will continue to praise Him in the hallway.
“I will praise the Lord at all times. I will constantly speak his praises. I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart. Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt His name together. I prayed to the Lord, and He answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to Him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces. In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; He saved me from all my troubles.” -Psalm 34:1-6
Life happened for me fast. I became a wife, a mom, and a graduate all within the same year. All of those major life transitions and I had no choice but to lean on God for strength. Although I was blessed and happy to begin a new chapter in my life, I was scared out of my mind and my anxiety was thru the roof! What if I’m not a good enough wife? What if I’m not a good enough mommy? What if I don’t find a job because my husband is in the military and we have to uproot our lives every few years? What if we don’t find a house in enough time? I was so overwhelmed and my “planning” became nonexistent. I would make a plan and it didn’t happen. I didn’t even realize that something greater was to come. I was literally doubting myself.
My husband, 4 month old daughter and I went to NC to get a jumpstart on house hunting. We had been on Zillow almost a year in advance saving potential homes. We were ready. And remember, I’m a planner. I thought to myself that sure enough we would find something since we started so early. Here’s a reminder, that no matter how early or late you start something, God is in control. With a cranky and sleepy baby and 2 tired parents, we toured several homes. Many that we liked and then some we didn’t. On the last night of our stay, we put in an offer for a gorgeous home and we waited patiently by the phone with hopes that it got accepted. Our realtor called and gave us the news that our offer wasn’t accepted. Confusion, anger, and sadness settled in. How could this have happened? We planned and got a jump start on things? In that moment, I heard God say, “Trust me.” My husband and I ended our night in prayer and sadness because we knew the next day we had to leave. Before leaving, we looked at a few more houses and decided to make one last offer on a home. My husband and I both looked at each other on the way home and he said, “We worked hard. Now the rest is in God’s hands and I have a great feeling about this one.”
We were home for about 2 hours when our realtor called and congratulated us! Our offer got accepted. God winked! I knew then that He had something so much better in store for us and He could’ve saved us from something that we didn’t see coming. Sometimes God tests us to see where our faith really is. If you can’t praise him, pray, and worship Him when you don’t get exactly what you want, how can He trust you enough to bless you with what you need? He knows best. Not your spouse/significant other. Not your parents/family. Not your friends. Not your realtor. Not even you. He does.
When we get out of the driver seat of our lives and let Him steer us, we will always see God wink. And it’s the best feeling ever!
Amber Seldon, M.Ed